Communication Before the Baby Arrives

Birth Mothers, Families, Parenting

Expanding your family through adoption is an exciting and wonderful experience. As you wait for your newest family member to arrive, you may have questions or concerns you wish to voice to the expectant parents.

Communication is the key to any successful adoption, but due to the delicate nature of this process, it helps to have an advocate. As a non-profit adoption agency working with families in Kansas and Missouri, Adoption & Beyond often acts in this role, helping both expectant and prospective adoptive parents communicate comfortably.

Know What You Want to Say

This is such an exciting time,  writing down questions you would like to ask will help a great deal when it comes time for your match meeting. Some important questions to consider are:

  • Tell us a little bit about why you are looking at a placement plan for your child? What has the adoption process been like for you so far? What are some important things that you want to have included in your adoption plan?
  • What is your idea of openness? How much and what type of contact are you wanting as the birth parent? What are your expectations of us as the adoptive parents in regards to openness?
  • What has your family life situation been like? What are some of your family traditions? What type of family life are you wanting for your child?
  • Are there any medical issues in your family which we should know about?

As you have a match meeting with an expectant mom, It is during this time that having a tangible list of questions in your hand will help you keep on track and get as much out of the conversation as possible.

Be sure to check out Adoption & Beyond’s full list of potential questions to ask during the matching meeting: The Adoption Matching Meeting Questions 

Speak Up and Ask Questions 

Sometimes adoptive parents feel they should not “rock the boat”, prior to placement,  for fear of upsetting the expectant birth mother.  This fear may prevent you from asking important questions. If you are unsure whether a question is appropriate, ask your adoption coordinator first. In many cases, we can facilitate tough conversations, or help you think through how to present the question to get the answers you seek without anyone taking offense.

Be Honest and Respectful

Above all, be sure to remain honest and respectful throughout the communication process. Remember, that these are the prospective birth parents of your future child,, it is best to begin your journey as parents on good footing. 

Speak with an Adoption Coordinator 

If you are e considering adoption, we invite you to contact Adoption & Beyond at 1-913-270-0282. We are always happy to provide counsel and advice during this wonderful time. We also offer a guide for healthcare professionals working with adoptive families which can be found here.

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