Adoption can be a beautiful process that few are blessed to experience.
It can be emotional for some, and unexpected situations may throw off those hoping to adopt. In my most recent episode on All About Adoption, I discuss what to be prepared for when adopting. Educating yourself and conducting research so you know what to expect can help the process to go smoother.
Here are some things to be prepared for when adopting:
- Be prepared to really like the expecting mom
This mom has chosen you and made a connection with you through your adoption profile. Be prepared to like her, because she is no longer a stranger! - Be prepared for the lack of prenatal care
This can be shocking for some hopeful adoptive parents. It’s important to give the mother the benefit of the doubt in this situation, as there may be many reasons why the mother doesn’t attend prenatal appointments. Some reasons could include a lack of support, lack of transportation, or a fear of the doctor’s response to some lifestyle choices the mother is making while pregnant. - Be prepared for the expecting parents to make very different decisions
Oftentimes, we may compare the expecting parents to ourselves and think through how our decisions may differ from theirs. A lot of times, expecting parents make decisions based on their life circumstances which you may not be able to understand. Decisions surrounding money or lifestyle decisions may not make sense to you. - Don’t be surprised if your infertility comes up or resurfaces
This may happen when you attend doctor’s appointments with the expecting mother. It may take some time to grieve the fact that you aren’t able to experience this yourself, and those feelings are normal. - This is not your baby
This may sound crass, but it is important to remember that this baby is not your baby UNTIL the expecting parents place the baby for adoption. It is important to know your role in this. You may want to step in or influence the expecting parent’s choices in life, but that is not your role in their life. You are there to give support in this process.
What did you think of this week’s YouTube video? Do you have any questions about preparing for an adoption? I’d love to hear them!
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