Check out the video on my YouTube channel HERE.
Let’s be real – finding out you’re pregnant when you weren’t planning to be can turn your world upside down. If you’re thinking about adoption, your mind is probably buzzing with questions. I’ve worked with many expecting moms in your shoes, and I want to walk you through some of the questions that often come up when considering adoption.
Can I Choose a Family for My Child?
Absolutely! When you work with a licensed adoption agency, you’ll get to look through profiles of many different families hoping to adopt. We actually recommend working with an agency specifically because they’ll have a wide range of families to choose from. This way, you can find the perfect match that fits exactly what you’re looking for in terms of values, lifestyle, and the kind of life you envision for your child.
How Much Contact Can I Have with My Child?
You have options both during and after birth. While you’re in the hospital, you can spend as much time with your baby as you’d like. Some moms want that time all to themselves, while others choose to share it with the adoptive family. There’s no right or wrong choice – it’s whatever feels best for you.
After placement, many birth mothers choose to have what’s called an “open adoption.” This means ongoing communication with both the adoptive family and your child as they grow up. You can work together to figure out what this looks like – whether it’s sharing photos and updates, having video calls, or arranging visits.
Think of it like keeping a door open – you can stay in touch with your child and their adoptive family as they grow up. You get to decide how wide that door stays open. Open adoption may not be available or legally enforceable in all states, as laws regarding Post Adoption Contact Agreements (PACAs) vary, so make sure you check with your agency and lawyer.
When Can the Baby Go Home with the Adoptive Family?
In most states, the baby can head home with their adoptive family straight from the hospital. But every state does things a bit differently, so it’s worth checking what the exact process is where you live.
How Much Will My Child Know About Me?
Every birth parent fills out what’s called social and medical history information. This ensures that even if you choose not to have ongoing contact, your child’s adoptive family will still have important information about your background and history. But these days, many birth parents choose open adoption, which means your child gets to know the real you – not just facts on paper.
What Rights Do Birth Fathers Have?
Both you and the baby’s father have certain rights, but – and this is important – these rights look really different depending on which state you’re in. This is one of those times when you’ll want to chat with an adoption attorney to get the full picture of how things work in your state.
How Can I Be Sure My Child Will Be Well-Cared For?
Here’s something that might put your mind at ease: adoptive families have to jump through quite a few hoops before they can adopt. We’re talking background checks, financial checks, home visits – the works! Licensed agencies put families through a pretty intense screening process (we call it a home study) to make sure they’re ready to provide a loving, stable home. That includes:
- Detailed background checks at state and federal levels
- Review of their financial stability
- Medical history evaluation
- Home visit by a social worker
- Personal and professional references
- In-depth interviews about their family background, parenting style, and motivation to adopt
They have to show us everything from their employment verification to their medical records, and we gather reference letters as well!
Do I Need My Own Attorney?
While some states allow adoption agencies to handle the entire process, as an adoption agency director, I strongly recommend having your own legal representation! Having your own attorney ensures you fully understand your rights and have someone looking out specifically for your interests throughout the process. The really good news? This legal representation is provided to you free of charge. Your attorney can help explain everything from your rights as a birth parent to the details of any adoption agreements. Knowledge is power!
Let’s Talk
I know this is a lot to think about. Making decisions about an unplanned pregnancy isn’t easy, and anyone who tells you otherwise probably hasn’t been there. Whether you’re just starting to consider adoption or you’re pretty sure it’s the right path for you, there are people who want to help – no pressure, no judgment, just support and answers to your questions.
Got questions? Feeling overwhelmed? That’s totally normal. Remember, adoption is a major decision, and having the right resources makes all the difference. At Adoption & Beyond, we believe in empowering you with the information and support you need to make the choice that’s best for you and your baby. We’re here for you. Call or Text: 913-271-3554
Ready to Learn More?
We’ve created a comprehensive, free Expecting Parent Guide filled with:
- Real stories from birth parents who’ve been where you are
- Clear, straightforward information about the adoption process
- Thoughtful guidance to help you explore your options
- Resources and support available to you
Download your FREE Expecting Parent Guide today
This blog post is provided for educational and informational purposes only. Our services are not financial, business, or legal advice. The information presented here is not a guarantee that you will obtain any results or earn any money using our content. Adoption & Beyond, Inc. owns all copyrights to the materials presented here unless otherwise noted.
