Match Meetings

AC=Questions that an Adoptive Couple might ask a birth parent.

BP=Questions that a Birth Parent might ask an adoptive couple.

Introduction:

Tell about yourselves: interests, hobbies, personality, employment, family life, etc.

The Decision to Adopt:

AC: Why have you chosen to place child for adoption? What has the adoption process been like for you? What are some important issues to you in your adoption plan?

BP: Why are you adopting a child? Do you plant to adopt again? What has the adoption process been like for you? What excitement and /or fears do you have in adopting a child? If adoptive couple has previously adopted: What was your first adoption experience like? Do you correspond with the birth parents?

Hopes for the Child:

AC: Do you have any dreams/hopes for the child? What do you want the child’s childhood to be like?

BP: What plans do you have for the child? What are your expectations for the child’s future?

Telling the Child of Adoption:

AC: What do you want the child to know about you? How do you plan on telling the child about your reasons for choosing an adoption placement plan, will you provide us (adoptive family) with a letter, pictures, video, etc.? What do you see as your role in the child’s future?

BP: How do you plan on telling the child he/she is adopted? At what age do you plan on talking to the child about his/her adoption? Do you know of other children who have been adopted? What do you see as some issues the child might face and need help with when dealing with his/her adoption?

Concept of Adoption & Openness in Adoption:

AC: What is your idea of openness? What do you feel openness in adoption can provide the child? What are your expectations of us as the adoptive parents in regards to openness? How much and what type of contact are you expecting as the birth parent? Do you plan on corresponding with us and the child in the future, and how often? What is your opinion of adoptive parents? What has been your past experience with adoption; are you adopted, so you know someone who is adopted, do you know an adoptive couple?

BP: What is your idea of openness? What do you feel openness in adoption can provide the child? Do you plan on corresponding with the birth parents? How often and what type of correspondence; letters, pictures, videos? Are you willing to accept letter, gifts, pictures from the birth parents? If your child wants to locate the birth parents will you be supportive and will you assist in the search? Do you ever foresee us meeting again in the future? What is your opinion of birth parents? What has been your past experience with adoption; are you adopted, do you know someone who is adopted, do you know an adoptive couple?

Medical/Health:

AC: Do you have any medical problems of concern (birth mother, birth father and family)? How has your pregnancy been? Is there any current or past drug, alcohol or cigarette usage or abuse? What medications/vitamins have you been on during pregnancy?

BP: Do you have any medical problems of concern (adoptive father, adoptive mother and family)? Is there any current or past drug, alcohol or cigarette usage or abuse? Do you have medical insurance/health insurance and will the child be covered? What medical care do you plan on giving the child?

Parenting Skills/Discipline:

AC: How were you raised as a child? What type of disciplining did you respond to best?

BP: What experience do you have with children? What are some of the discipline methods you have discussed using in raising a child? How were you raised as a child? If the child has special needs which are undetected at birth for example ADHD, hyperactivity, learning disabilities how do you plan on handling such issues? How will you encourage or direct your child into his/her talents? Discuss child care issues; stay at home parent, public daycare, private day care provider. Who will be the child’s primary care giver?

Education/Career:

AC: What year are you in school? Do you plan on going to college? What subjects did you do well in? What subjects did you have trouble with? What type of student are you? What career do you wish to purse? What type/level of education do you want your child to achieve?

BP: What is your educational background? What type of education are you going to use for your child: public schools, private schools, home schooling? Will you encourage your child to go to college and/or trade school? How do you see yourselves directing your child toward a specific talent or interest?

Family Life:

AC: What has your family life situation been like? What are some of your family traditions? What type of family life are you wanting for your child?

BP: What has your family life situation been like? What are some of your family traditions? Is there any divorce in the family? How close are you to your relatives? Discuss family vacations, pets, family activities, social groups that they are involved in.

Religion:

AC:What is your religious background? Discuss your faith and commitment to God. Are you involved in a church group? Are your family members Christian? What do you desire for your child to know about God?

BP: What is your religious background? Discuss your faith and commitment to God. Are your family members Christians? Are you involved in any church ministry? Discuss your church’s nursery, children’s ministry and youth ministry. What church services do you attend?

Fears/Concerns:

AC: What is your greatest fear about the upcoming adoption plan? What might alter your decision to proceed with an adoption placement plan?

BP: What is your greatest fear about the upcoming adoption plan? What might alter your decision to adopt the child?